Afternoon, dull weather innit!
I had a real test yesterday at work. The worst thing that could have happened to me at work happened, well one of the worst. Somebody was ill down the aisle opposite our deli counter. Would you believe int he two and a half years that Martin has worked there he has never witnessed this, bloody typical that it happens right in front of me. Now if you don't already know, I do have emetophobia, fear of vomiting, which if I see somebody be ill it would amount to the same level of fear as if you put a few tarantulas on an arachnophobe.
So my normal reaction to this would be to flee, if I'd have been shopping in my own time and this happened I would have been out of that store in 5 seconds flat shaking, possibly crying, depending on how bad the situation or how much I witnessed. Now obviously I could not run anywhere, I'm stuck behind the counter serving so I was stuck. I had to deal with it, a massive task. I did shake, my legs turned to jelly, my brain went to jelly, I wanted to flee but I didn't. I took deep breaths and continued as if nothing had happened. And what was a bit of a revelation to me was seeing how panicky everyone else was around this situation. I've never stayed around long enough to actually see what happens in events like this, I was amazed to see colleagues on the shop floor flapping their arms, holding their hearts, all worked up, just as I have done all my life. The policy at Sainsbury's is that if you see a spillage, of any kind, you own it, it is your responsibility, no matter what it is, blood, urine, vomit, anything, but nobody wanted to go down this aisle, let alone clear it up. Do you know, I really don't feel such a freak, I mean who does like situations like this? Who would willingly volunteer to clear it up. I saw a couple of girls absolutely horrified, almost to the same level I was. Maybe I am not so abnormal after all. This poor lad drew the short straw and went and mopped it up, and at the end of my shift I made myself walk down this aisle, slowly, used it as a kind of therapy. I know it's very odd but being an emetophobe I probably would never have walked down that aisle ever again, well I would have given it at least a year.
I would normally replay this scene over and over in my head, remaining shaky for a few days, but by the end of my five hour shift I was fine, I was absolutely fine. I think about it now and actually I am still fine, I think I am 'normal'
What did amaze me was that this person continued to shop, let everyone around them faff about while she continued to shop. Although I must admit when she came over to the deli I ran in to our back room and let Martin serve her, that would have been pushing myself too far, I did not want to risk being that close to her if she did it again. I don't understand that though, if, God forbid, that ever happened to me, I would offer to clear it up, and get out of there as fast as I could. It would be my worst worst nightmare ever. But to casually continue shopping, is it just me or does that seem bizarre?
I would appreciate you honest opinions on this, because part of my recovery is to learn about other people's reactions, and learn from them.
thank you x
I had a real test yesterday at work. The worst thing that could have happened to me at work happened, well one of the worst. Somebody was ill down the aisle opposite our deli counter. Would you believe int he two and a half years that Martin has worked there he has never witnessed this, bloody typical that it happens right in front of me. Now if you don't already know, I do have emetophobia, fear of vomiting, which if I see somebody be ill it would amount to the same level of fear as if you put a few tarantulas on an arachnophobe.
So my normal reaction to this would be to flee, if I'd have been shopping in my own time and this happened I would have been out of that store in 5 seconds flat shaking, possibly crying, depending on how bad the situation or how much I witnessed. Now obviously I could not run anywhere, I'm stuck behind the counter serving so I was stuck. I had to deal with it, a massive task. I did shake, my legs turned to jelly, my brain went to jelly, I wanted to flee but I didn't. I took deep breaths and continued as if nothing had happened. And what was a bit of a revelation to me was seeing how panicky everyone else was around this situation. I've never stayed around long enough to actually see what happens in events like this, I was amazed to see colleagues on the shop floor flapping their arms, holding their hearts, all worked up, just as I have done all my life. The policy at Sainsbury's is that if you see a spillage, of any kind, you own it, it is your responsibility, no matter what it is, blood, urine, vomit, anything, but nobody wanted to go down this aisle, let alone clear it up. Do you know, I really don't feel such a freak, I mean who does like situations like this? Who would willingly volunteer to clear it up. I saw a couple of girls absolutely horrified, almost to the same level I was. Maybe I am not so abnormal after all. This poor lad drew the short straw and went and mopped it up, and at the end of my shift I made myself walk down this aisle, slowly, used it as a kind of therapy. I know it's very odd but being an emetophobe I probably would never have walked down that aisle ever again, well I would have given it at least a year.
I would normally replay this scene over and over in my head, remaining shaky for a few days, but by the end of my five hour shift I was fine, I was absolutely fine. I think about it now and actually I am still fine, I think I am 'normal'
What did amaze me was that this person continued to shop, let everyone around them faff about while she continued to shop. Although I must admit when she came over to the deli I ran in to our back room and let Martin serve her, that would have been pushing myself too far, I did not want to risk being that close to her if she did it again. I don't understand that though, if, God forbid, that ever happened to me, I would offer to clear it up, and get out of there as fast as I could. It would be my worst worst nightmare ever. But to casually continue shopping, is it just me or does that seem bizarre?
I would appreciate you honest opinions on this, because part of my recovery is to learn about other people's reactions, and learn from them.
thank you x
5 comments:
Hi
I used to be exactly the same, if someone was slightly drunk I wouldnt go within 10feet of them in case they were sick, but a combination of 9 months severe morning sickness and a child who was frequently sick and now suffers from migraines I am ALMOST cured! Still hyperventolate at the sound but can manage! Louise
Hi by the way
Hi Louise, thanks for sharing, the more I open up the more I realise I'm not so alone with this phobia. After all, who likes the whole caboodle that ick is (even though it is just a tad worse for me, like I'd rather die than be sick, and that's the truth) But I'm learning, and trying.
x
I am not an emetophobe, but you wouldn't have seen me for dust if i had witnessed this. Your re-action was brilliant and you should be proud of yourself, you are normal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wv ovennest
WV... Lynnbrave... honest!
:o)
Ick is horrible isn't it. I can deal with mine or with J's, anyone else would have to clear their own up I'm afraid. Can't believe that woman just carried on with her shopping! I'd of been out of there like a shot, then I'd never ever have gone back!
xxx
I can deal with vomit (and girl, I am GOOD....I can tell when it's coming and have a cup or something ready to catch it....LOL....I know, gross, but still...), but if it comes out the other end, forget it.
She just continued her shopping?! Good grief.....I'd have been mortified, left, and never gone back!
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